Hello Familia,
If you are blood-related, please do not donate blood or platelets at the Blood Donor Center at the hospital, and especially do not donate either directly to her. If she continuously receives blood products that are genetically linked to someone that may be a bone marrow match, her body may develop antibodies to those products, thus rejecting the marrow. Sorry I didn't mention this before....so many things are becoming clear to me just in the past few days. Another of those things being that .....
You CAN donate blood directly to Jill, and platelets (this is especially needed and preferred). Did I already blog that? We spent a full day at Disneyland/CA Adventure today (me, Anna, my sister, her boyfriend, and my niece) & my brain is fried....my legs still feel like they are pounding pavement...MUST SLEEP....we have trick-or-treating at the hospital bright & early tomorrow morning.....I'll send pictures! Can't wait.
Oh, and Jill will maybe be going home by Friday (for a measly 3-6 days, but still really cool), so if you planned on visiting this weekend, please make sure & call first!
Michelle
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Will & Grace
So, Jill is doing amazing! She is only hooked up to tubes (for antibiotics) a few times a day (for an hour or less). She gets infusions of platelets & blood every few days (2 hours), but other than that, is "free". And that's all that baby really needs to be over the moon, happy. For those of you who have not witnessed the Bean FFFFFFLYYYYYYing down the hallway on her push car, & screeching to a dead-on accurate stop right before someone's toes, it is quite the sight. Daily, she wakes up (after sleeping through the night, just like she always has), with a beaming grin, "I wate up!", delves into her breakfast (a couple of weeks ago, she had bacon for the first time since we arrived here...she has bacon every Friday at Rose, her daycare lady's, house...and she exclaimed, "Mommy! Rose make befest foh ME!!!"), and after a quick wipe-down, leaves this room, for a 2 hour stint of running, riding, playing hide-n-seek (you'd be surprised how many hiding places there are in a hallway), ringing around the rosie, galloping, dancing, shaking her head back & forth until she's dizzy, flirting with every human being who even sort-of notices her, going in circles & circles on her "Pee Pin" (Sit'n'Spin), and experiencing the love from the Child Life Gals in the Playroom, doing crafts, "Pay Pee-doh" (play playdough), playing the piano, and otherwise, just enjoying her happy-go-lucky life in a place that is not quite "home", but not that far removed. SHE IS A JOY. She is an INSPIRATION! She makes me so entirely happy. Beyond words, happy. Smiling wildly for hours, happy. Nothing can stop me, happy.
And this little description of my girl, above, is why I am not down about her cancer. She has taken this packet of bad news, dumped it out, mixed it up with flowers, smiles, kisses, and glitter & thrown it up in the air, so now, when it falls down around us, yes, it's annoying....it gets in our hair, it makes a big mess...but it's also pretty and unique, and Jill's own.
I was talking with my friend, Shana last night about how every day brings an epiphany for me....the "aha" moments Oprah speaks of....I get it. The pain of this is nothing compared to the BEAUTY of this. Maybe it has much to do with the person I saw myself as before cancer came to us. Among other "pleasant" things (otherwise, I guess I wouldn't have so many great friends), I was cynical, somewhat judgemental, I belabored silly points...I wasted so much energy on being frustrated or tired or irritated. Irritable. That about summed me up. I remember telling a number of close friends the first few weeks of this that the mantra that kept me up at night was, "What doesn't make you stronger, kills you." I also told Shana, that if I got a disease like this, the person giving the eulogy at my funeral would not say, "She was a fighter," but that "She gave up the minute she found out". Well, this, after the initial shock and despair passed, has turned me into someone BETTER. I have no interest in being pissed off or agitated that we have loud roomates, or that my nurse that day didn't fully understand my questions, or that the mom I met in the playroom who was distraught over her kid's diagnosis, had nothing to complain about compared to the diagnosis we received. For some reason, Jill has enabled me to see the Big Picture. To realize that every moment counts, and that EVERYONE is fighting something. That noone or thing is inherently bad......people get through their everyday the best they know how, and things happen, good and bad to keep the flow going. It's not that NOTHING matters, rather that EVERYTHING does.
I happened upon a website yesterday entitled, "Caylee's Hope". It was dedicated to a 4 year-old girl who's parents found out she had AML (Jill's cancer) 3 HOURS before she died.....a very high fever brought her to the hospital. 3 Hours. If for no other reason, we are blessed to have at the very least, 6 months to spend the highest quality time with our beautiful little girl and get to know her better. How much actual hard-core REAL time did I spend with my girls before this? I mean, yeah, I was lucky to have 2 days a week off of work with them....but how much of that time was daily chores/errands/email/phone calls/go play with your sister, I need a break time? Not at all to suggest that those things aren't important as well, but THIS being here EVERY DAY ALL DAY has forced us to experience who Jillian is. And I am just thrilled to have that chance.
So much good has come our family's way since the last time I entered a blog....I will write more about that later, but for now, I want to leave you with a quote my friend, Renee, shared with me recently.....
"The will of God will not take you to where the grace of God will not protect you."
I have never felt so protected in my entire life.
And this little description of my girl, above, is why I am not down about her cancer. She has taken this packet of bad news, dumped it out, mixed it up with flowers, smiles, kisses, and glitter & thrown it up in the air, so now, when it falls down around us, yes, it's annoying....it gets in our hair, it makes a big mess...but it's also pretty and unique, and Jill's own.
I was talking with my friend, Shana last night about how every day brings an epiphany for me....the "aha" moments Oprah speaks of....I get it. The pain of this is nothing compared to the BEAUTY of this. Maybe it has much to do with the person I saw myself as before cancer came to us. Among other "pleasant" things (otherwise, I guess I wouldn't have so many great friends), I was cynical, somewhat judgemental, I belabored silly points...I wasted so much energy on being frustrated or tired or irritated. Irritable. That about summed me up. I remember telling a number of close friends the first few weeks of this that the mantra that kept me up at night was, "What doesn't make you stronger, kills you." I also told Shana, that if I got a disease like this, the person giving the eulogy at my funeral would not say, "She was a fighter," but that "She gave up the minute she found out". Well, this, after the initial shock and despair passed, has turned me into someone BETTER. I have no interest in being pissed off or agitated that we have loud roomates, or that my nurse that day didn't fully understand my questions, or that the mom I met in the playroom who was distraught over her kid's diagnosis, had nothing to complain about compared to the diagnosis we received. For some reason, Jill has enabled me to see the Big Picture. To realize that every moment counts, and that EVERYONE is fighting something. That noone or thing is inherently bad......people get through their everyday the best they know how, and things happen, good and bad to keep the flow going. It's not that NOTHING matters, rather that EVERYTHING does.
I happened upon a website yesterday entitled, "Caylee's Hope". It was dedicated to a 4 year-old girl who's parents found out she had AML (Jill's cancer) 3 HOURS before she died.....a very high fever brought her to the hospital. 3 Hours. If for no other reason, we are blessed to have at the very least, 6 months to spend the highest quality time with our beautiful little girl and get to know her better. How much actual hard-core REAL time did I spend with my girls before this? I mean, yeah, I was lucky to have 2 days a week off of work with them....but how much of that time was daily chores/errands/email/phone calls/go play with your sister, I need a break time? Not at all to suggest that those things aren't important as well, but THIS being here EVERY DAY ALL DAY has forced us to experience who Jillian is. And I am just thrilled to have that chance.
So much good has come our family's way since the last time I entered a blog....I will write more about that later, but for now, I want to leave you with a quote my friend, Renee, shared with me recently.....
"The will of God will not take you to where the grace of God will not protect you."
I have never felt so protected in my entire life.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
St. Louisans...Unite!
From Laura Crowley (thanks, Laura):
Just so everyone knows, we are in the process of organizing a drive in St. Louis, and St Louis has a "community matching funds" program that brings down the fee for donors to $25 (from $52). Also, the information I've read says that should you be a match for someone, the bone marrow donation process is done under anesthesia, so it's not that painful in and of itself, although most people are sore for a few days. I'll be sure to get information to everyone once we have a time and a place.
Just so everyone knows, we are in the process of organizing a drive in St. Louis, and St Louis has a "community matching funds" program that brings down the fee for donors to $25 (from $52). Also, the information I've read says that should you be a match for someone, the bone marrow donation process is done under anesthesia, so it's not that painful in and of itself, although most people are sore for a few days. I'll be sure to get information to everyone once we have a time and a place.
We want your comments !!!
I've heard from many people that they want to comment on a posting, but have not been able to as they do not have a gmail account. Never fear, I have changed the settings, and now (I think) this will not be a problem. And we really would like to hear what you have to say...those that have figured out how to comment already, we salute your intelligence & appreciate hearing your opinions. This is not to say that the rest of you are morons. I probably wouldn't've been able to figure it out either.
I've emailed a handful of people who have made themselves greatly available & are involved in such things as setting up the bone marrow drives, inviting them to put new posts on the blog. If you have not been invited & would like to post (at any time), I will gladly add you to the list!
I've emailed a handful of people who have made themselves greatly available & are involved in such things as setting up the bone marrow drives, inviting them to put new posts on the blog. If you have not been invited & would like to post (at any time), I will gladly add you to the list!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
The Next Step
Matt & I met with the doctor & nurse educator today & here's the lowdown:
Although Jill has a chromosomal abnormality (11q23), she may not be in the "high risk" category if, at the end of this cycle of chemo (in about 2-3 weeks), they find less than 15% blasts (leukemia cells) in her marrow. The doctor seems to think she will land in "intermediate risk" category as she responded really well to chemo right away.
Anna had blood drawn yesterday (needle in her arm for about 2 minutes while he filled up 3 vials of blood...she sang, you guessed it, "Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead" until it was over, smiling the whole time....what a TROOPER!! Our nurse was hella-impressed!). They also drew our blood, NOT because we are likely to match, but rather to get an idea of the genetics behind her bone marrow type, which will help them track down a donor (if Anna is not a match) through the National Donor Marrow Registry (http://www.marrow.org/). There is a 25% chance Anna will be a match, and IF SHE IS, we will go to transplant as soon as our doctors & the transplant team at either UCLA or CHLA (we've not decided on a hospital yet) are ready to move forward....she MAY finish up all 5 cycles of chemo, but will likely go to transplant after the 2nd or 3rd, once they are certain she is in remission. More on that later...too much info to go into a "maybe".
IF Anna is not a match, Jill will finish up the 5 cycles of chemo (taking us to at least April), going home for 3-6 days each month in between cycles (10 days of chemo, 2-3 weeks of "recovery" during which her White Blood Cells rise back up), and we will wait to see if she relapses.
IF she relapses, we go to transplant from a Matched Unrelated Donor (MUD). We have a "pretty good" chance of finding at least one unrelated match as 80% of the people in the registry, at this time, are Caucasian, and (didya know???) bone marrow follows ethnic lines!!
Bottom Line: Let the bone marrow drives BEGIN! Even if Anna is a match (most ideal), Jill's body COULD reject it & we would need to go to a MUD match. They will be looking at the Bone Marrow and Cord Blood Registry (so bank your new baby's cord blood for yourself, and pay a yearly fee....good insurance for you & your family....or donate it!! Don't let it go to waste!!).
If you are now questioning whether or not to participate in the drive because you are not Caucasian & there is no chance you would be a match for Jill, please read carefully....this is probably the most important bit of information I have or ever will share in my life (and unlike most of the nonsense I spew, this is NOT an opinion):
We would be elated if one of you, our friends, our family, people we don't even know from our community, are a match for our baby. But please do this, not just for Jillian, but for the person in Texas whose LIFE.....YOU.....may SAVE.
Here's what it entails.....a cheek swab & processing fee ($50, but we are working on getting it reduced or waived). IF you are found to be a match for someone, you will need to take a few days off of work & endure (depending on your pain tolerance) a "painful" procedure of having a needle inserted into your hip bones, repeatedly, to draw out as much marrow as is needed by the recipient (in Jill's case, not much). You will be sore afterwards for up to a week, maybe more. All of your medical costs will be covered, but not your time off work...unfortunately, the donor recipient is given no information on who you are....if there is a way for you to contact them, I'm sure they would gladly cash out their 401K & deposit it into your bank account.
I'm not about guilting anyone into this. If you don't do it, we won't know! I just want everyone to consider what these little kids go through having cancer and weigh THAT against the inconvenience & discomfort of passing a little bit of your life on.......
I love each & every one of you....I'm loving more and more every day, and seeing so much good around every corner, and being faced with challenges (as simple as sleeping through blaring soap operas on the Telemundo channel) that I never imagined I could conquer!! It's not fun, but it's rewarding. I am so much stronger already. You, as a community of friends & family, have greatly contributed to that strength.
More to follow.......................................................................................................................
Although Jill has a chromosomal abnormality (11q23), she may not be in the "high risk" category if, at the end of this cycle of chemo (in about 2-3 weeks), they find less than 15% blasts (leukemia cells) in her marrow. The doctor seems to think she will land in "intermediate risk" category as she responded really well to chemo right away.
Anna had blood drawn yesterday (needle in her arm for about 2 minutes while he filled up 3 vials of blood...she sang, you guessed it, "Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead" until it was over, smiling the whole time....what a TROOPER!! Our nurse was hella-impressed!). They also drew our blood, NOT because we are likely to match, but rather to get an idea of the genetics behind her bone marrow type, which will help them track down a donor (if Anna is not a match) through the National Donor Marrow Registry (http://www.marrow.org/). There is a 25% chance Anna will be a match, and IF SHE IS, we will go to transplant as soon as our doctors & the transplant team at either UCLA or CHLA (we've not decided on a hospital yet) are ready to move forward....she MAY finish up all 5 cycles of chemo, but will likely go to transplant after the 2nd or 3rd, once they are certain she is in remission. More on that later...too much info to go into a "maybe".
IF Anna is not a match, Jill will finish up the 5 cycles of chemo (taking us to at least April), going home for 3-6 days each month in between cycles (10 days of chemo, 2-3 weeks of "recovery" during which her White Blood Cells rise back up), and we will wait to see if she relapses.
IF she relapses, we go to transplant from a Matched Unrelated Donor (MUD). We have a "pretty good" chance of finding at least one unrelated match as 80% of the people in the registry, at this time, are Caucasian, and (didya know???) bone marrow follows ethnic lines!!
Bottom Line: Let the bone marrow drives BEGIN! Even if Anna is a match (most ideal), Jill's body COULD reject it & we would need to go to a MUD match. They will be looking at the Bone Marrow and Cord Blood Registry (so bank your new baby's cord blood for yourself, and pay a yearly fee....good insurance for you & your family....or donate it!! Don't let it go to waste!!).
If you are now questioning whether or not to participate in the drive because you are not Caucasian & there is no chance you would be a match for Jill, please read carefully....this is probably the most important bit of information I have or ever will share in my life (and unlike most of the nonsense I spew, this is NOT an opinion):
Leukemia is not a White Man's Disease.
Leukemia kills.
Oodles of people (much like us) have NO chance of survival if they do not get a donor.
We have met these people. They are real.
They need you (Hispanics, Asians, African Americans, those of "mixed" descent).
They have babies, toddlers, children, teenagers, hanging onto life.
HOPING. PRAYING for a match.
Leukemia kills.
Oodles of people (much like us) have NO chance of survival if they do not get a donor.
We have met these people. They are real.
They need you (Hispanics, Asians, African Americans, those of "mixed" descent).
They have babies, toddlers, children, teenagers, hanging onto life.
HOPING. PRAYING for a match.
We would be elated if one of you, our friends, our family, people we don't even know from our community, are a match for our baby. But please do this, not just for Jillian, but for the person in Texas whose LIFE.....YOU.....may SAVE.
Here's what it entails.....a cheek swab & processing fee ($50, but we are working on getting it reduced or waived). IF you are found to be a match for someone, you will need to take a few days off of work & endure (depending on your pain tolerance) a "painful" procedure of having a needle inserted into your hip bones, repeatedly, to draw out as much marrow as is needed by the recipient (in Jill's case, not much). You will be sore afterwards for up to a week, maybe more. All of your medical costs will be covered, but not your time off work...unfortunately, the donor recipient is given no information on who you are....if there is a way for you to contact them, I'm sure they would gladly cash out their 401K & deposit it into your bank account.
I'm not about guilting anyone into this. If you don't do it, we won't know! I just want everyone to consider what these little kids go through having cancer and weigh THAT against the inconvenience & discomfort of passing a little bit of your life on.......
I love each & every one of you....I'm loving more and more every day, and seeing so much good around every corner, and being faced with challenges (as simple as sleeping through blaring soap operas on the Telemundo channel) that I never imagined I could conquer!! It's not fun, but it's rewarding. I am so much stronger already. You, as a community of friends & family, have greatly contributed to that strength.
More to follow.......................................................................................................................
Monday, October 22, 2007
More Thanks Due
Jannah~For bringing us dinner on our anniversary....from our favorite Thai restaurant. We gazed lovingly into each other's eyes across the sticky tray table by the flourescent light, fondly listening to machines beeping while the sick baby slept :) So romantic!
Stephanie~For the adorable Wizard of Oz dolls. Jill plays with them every day....she alternates which one will administer her oral meds or swab her mouth (she hates the mouthwash stuff they make her use)...it's so much easier to take when the Tin Man is holding the swab :)
Eldris~I miss you!!! Thanks for the Dorothy Snow Globe Music Box!!! Jilli can't wait for me to turn it all the way, she starts yelling, "Snow Globe" in a most hilarious way (sounds a little like, "Sdleh Dloh"..spit flying) & singing along to "Somewhere Over the Rainbow"....it's always "way up high".
Olga & Ralph~For the Dorothy figurine...Jill has to have both the snow globe & figurine at the same time...they talk to each other. Your cards were so sweet. We really appreciate that you thought of us :)
Rosemarie, Belen, & Sheila~For dropping books off on our porch! How thoughtful! We have yet to go through the bag, but are in the process of switching things out. Thanks for labeling them! We'll let you know when she's "done" with them.
Jessie~For your awesome "Jellybeans for JillyBean" campaign & delightful care package! Love the picture collages. Anna loves her TinkerBell lunchbox!! I'll get to the Thank You notes later (maybe), but for now, I'm copping out with impersonal, yet public email thanks. It's the wave of the future (and I'm a little short on time). Oh yeah, and it's only because of your bag of candy that I'm still up at 3:30 am. I was so ready for bed when the Butterfingers screamed my name & I just had to oblige. Now I'm high on chocolate. Thanks a whole lot.
Kevin T. Ridgeway~For your BEEEEUUUUUUTIFUL letter....so eloquent & inspiring. You made me cry. Then I saw you on the ladder picking apples, in the middle of the pumpkin patch, and chumming it up with a drag queen and I couldn't stop laughing. I loved your postcard, too. I need some funny around here. You come on down whenever the spirit leads you. Nuestro casa es su casa. Our food is yours to prepare, our toilets, yours to scrub. I mean it....you got time? Get on da plane.
Jack & Jessica~For staying through the puke (Jack, thanks for cleaning up) & helping me give the Little a bath :) For composing pics with Dorothy (the life-size cardboard cutout, compliments of Miss Jessica) & chatting so late so I didn't have to be alone. Have a good trip, Jack...I have your cooler. Call me when you get back.
Kristi & Ian~For taking Anna for her very first sleepover on Friday and for making it so fun, she didn't even call her momma!! I now have a big reason to love Fridays!! No really, you guys have helped us in so many ways thusfar....we don't know how to thank you :) Except to allow you to take our daughter whenever you need your daughter occupied & out of your hair. Like I said, You're Welcome :)
Ally & Sallie~For visiting on Saturday, bringing yummy food & presents & for your sweet, genuine company. You made me feel better on a not-so-great day. Thank you for being there for us. I will light the lavender candle soon...so excited!!
Danielle~For all the emails & words of support, the Guardian Angel charm & echinacea & adorable pics of your grandson.
Felicia~For the nice card & cardstock! How great of you!!
Carolyn~For your generous gift....I was very moved.
For the anonymous emailer who has offered to pay our cell phone bill (who are you???) It is truly an amazing thing to give and not wish to be recognized. Drives me crazy not to know. If you change your mind & want to tell me who you are, I'll still let you pay the bill. Seriously, though, if there is a way for you to maintain your secret identity & communicate w/me via email, I have some important info to share.....please email me at squashdiddlydoo@msn.com.
Uncle Tom~For the adorable Colorado Moose/Bear books. Anna really digs them!! Jill's a little young, but I really appreciate it!!!!
Uncle Chuck~For your sweet card.
Aunt Ginny & Uncle Denny~For the packages....we devoured the first one, and were a little bummed we couldn't eat the second one :) I think Jill will enjoy the video and am sure Anna will love the Maisy book. And for the monetary gift....thank you so much.
Leah & Sandra~Leah, for giving blood & delivering cardstock & for your loving, kind demeanor that always makes me feel I can talk to you. You know what we are going through and we appreciate your candidness & allowing us (me) to be candid as well. Sandra, I love your comments on the blog. You are so sweet!! I'm so glad Matt is working amongst so many beautiful people.
Michelle & Lisa~For the toys, the dinner, the laptop to borrow!!!! The blood-letting, the visits, the offers of more & more & more help. You guys are truly amazing. Something about Denison just brings out the best in people!!!
Rose & Maria~For the visit!! Jill loved seeing you, Rose....thank you for bringing our attention to the bruising. If you hadn't mentioned it, we probably would not have caught this cancer as soon as we did. We love you.
Susan & Ann~For visiting, bringing cardstock & books & pictures, toys for Jill, and for cheering me up with your adorable babies!!!!
Shana & Dina~For visiting today and for getting our minds off the bad news (next blog..I'm too tired to talk about it right now).....Shana, I love you for just showing up & doing what needs to be done like it's no big deal....for playing with Jill so I can talk on the phone & getting excited about taking action to change this bad news to good. Dina....my coffee saviour! Thanks for all the yummy goodies (still waiting for the BILL!!) & helping me organize. I feel so much better. Thanks to Jim for watching Anna today, too!!
Shaana~For your awesome chicken dish---it was GREAT!!! Anna hasn't seen her purse yet, but she's gonna love it! Thanks for the Cheer Bear/CD...so cute. And for assisting in the organization/carting 'o stuff down to the car. And for the research....I'll look into it soon.
Colleen~For making Anna laugh & for humoring her just about every day when we get home from school. For befriending my Mom....she freaking LOVES you....I'm like, "Okay, MOM! Enough about Colleen already!! Geez, she's not THAT great!" and for the hilarious picture of Anna as Dorothy. And for giving Dorothy an impromptu tour of your house, allowing her to open every single door without asking first and acting like it was no big deal. She digs you in a BIG way. AND for the surprise kitchen!! Jill is going to pee in her pants...which is no big deal, really...she does it at least 8 times every day.
Steve~For the enlightening chat. We are on the same wavelength....shutup Karen.
Mom~For staying with us for 2 whole weeks, playing countless hours with Anna, driving her to/from school, cleaning our house, cooking, hanging out with me at the hospital, and just being there to talk....it was great sharing a Corona with you on your last night. You are such a great person, and I'm glad we're friends.
And to everyone I didn't mention, who called or visited (I don't think I left out any visitors) or made food or brought us a needed item....I am too tired to think anymore tonight, but know that I appreciate every single act of kindness bestowed upon us. We are eternally grateful.
Jill is a ball of energy & doing awesome. She's flying up & down the hallways on her little car...I think they took the NG Tube out tonight. And I guess I'll share...but I don't have much detail....they found out today that she has a chromosomal abnormality (11q23), so she will absolutely need a bone marrow or stem cell transplant. Let the driving (bone marrow driving, that is) BEGIN. My Pedro friends have come up with some pretty great ideas on how to get some media attention or at least raise some funds ....my Torrance friend (Ann) is already fast at work on getting a drive going through TUSD, and my MO family, I hear, is getting it going, too. We need lots of prayer, love, & support (as per usual)....if Anna is a match, that is the best chance Jill's got. They will be testing her this week, I think. Whew. This is way more than I thought I could ever handle. Ask me tomorrow (today) how I'm doing.....I need to get to BED!! It's almost sun up! Thanks for listening....
Stephanie~For the adorable Wizard of Oz dolls. Jill plays with them every day....she alternates which one will administer her oral meds or swab her mouth (she hates the mouthwash stuff they make her use)...it's so much easier to take when the Tin Man is holding the swab :)
Eldris~I miss you!!! Thanks for the Dorothy Snow Globe Music Box!!! Jilli can't wait for me to turn it all the way, she starts yelling, "Snow Globe" in a most hilarious way (sounds a little like, "Sdleh Dloh"..spit flying) & singing along to "Somewhere Over the Rainbow"....it's always "way up high".
Olga & Ralph~For the Dorothy figurine...Jill has to have both the snow globe & figurine at the same time...they talk to each other. Your cards were so sweet. We really appreciate that you thought of us :)
Rosemarie, Belen, & Sheila~For dropping books off on our porch! How thoughtful! We have yet to go through the bag, but are in the process of switching things out. Thanks for labeling them! We'll let you know when she's "done" with them.
Jessie~For your awesome "Jellybeans for JillyBean" campaign & delightful care package! Love the picture collages. Anna loves her TinkerBell lunchbox!! I'll get to the Thank You notes later (maybe), but for now, I'm copping out with impersonal, yet public email thanks. It's the wave of the future (and I'm a little short on time). Oh yeah, and it's only because of your bag of candy that I'm still up at 3:30 am. I was so ready for bed when the Butterfingers screamed my name & I just had to oblige. Now I'm high on chocolate. Thanks a whole lot.
Kevin T. Ridgeway~For your BEEEEUUUUUUTIFUL letter....so eloquent & inspiring. You made me cry. Then I saw you on the ladder picking apples, in the middle of the pumpkin patch, and chumming it up with a drag queen and I couldn't stop laughing. I loved your postcard, too. I need some funny around here. You come on down whenever the spirit leads you. Nuestro casa es su casa. Our food is yours to prepare, our toilets, yours to scrub. I mean it....you got time? Get on da plane.
Jack & Jessica~For staying through the puke (Jack, thanks for cleaning up) & helping me give the Little a bath :) For composing pics with Dorothy (the life-size cardboard cutout, compliments of Miss Jessica) & chatting so late so I didn't have to be alone. Have a good trip, Jack...I have your cooler. Call me when you get back.
Kristi & Ian~For taking Anna for her very first sleepover on Friday and for making it so fun, she didn't even call her momma!! I now have a big reason to love Fridays!! No really, you guys have helped us in so many ways thusfar....we don't know how to thank you :) Except to allow you to take our daughter whenever you need your daughter occupied & out of your hair. Like I said, You're Welcome :)
Ally & Sallie~For visiting on Saturday, bringing yummy food & presents & for your sweet, genuine company. You made me feel better on a not-so-great day. Thank you for being there for us. I will light the lavender candle soon...so excited!!
Danielle~For all the emails & words of support, the Guardian Angel charm & echinacea & adorable pics of your grandson.
Felicia~For the nice card & cardstock! How great of you!!
Carolyn~For your generous gift....I was very moved.
For the anonymous emailer who has offered to pay our cell phone bill (who are you???) It is truly an amazing thing to give and not wish to be recognized. Drives me crazy not to know. If you change your mind & want to tell me who you are, I'll still let you pay the bill. Seriously, though, if there is a way for you to maintain your secret identity & communicate w/me via email, I have some important info to share.....please email me at squashdiddlydoo@msn.com.
Uncle Tom~For the adorable Colorado Moose/Bear books. Anna really digs them!! Jill's a little young, but I really appreciate it!!!!
Uncle Chuck~For your sweet card.
Aunt Ginny & Uncle Denny~For the packages....we devoured the first one, and were a little bummed we couldn't eat the second one :) I think Jill will enjoy the video and am sure Anna will love the Maisy book. And for the monetary gift....thank you so much.
Leah & Sandra~Leah, for giving blood & delivering cardstock & for your loving, kind demeanor that always makes me feel I can talk to you. You know what we are going through and we appreciate your candidness & allowing us (me) to be candid as well. Sandra, I love your comments on the blog. You are so sweet!! I'm so glad Matt is working amongst so many beautiful people.
Michelle & Lisa~For the toys, the dinner, the laptop to borrow!!!! The blood-letting, the visits, the offers of more & more & more help. You guys are truly amazing. Something about Denison just brings out the best in people!!!
Rose & Maria~For the visit!! Jill loved seeing you, Rose....thank you for bringing our attention to the bruising. If you hadn't mentioned it, we probably would not have caught this cancer as soon as we did. We love you.
Susan & Ann~For visiting, bringing cardstock & books & pictures, toys for Jill, and for cheering me up with your adorable babies!!!!
Shana & Dina~For visiting today and for getting our minds off the bad news (next blog..I'm too tired to talk about it right now).....Shana, I love you for just showing up & doing what needs to be done like it's no big deal....for playing with Jill so I can talk on the phone & getting excited about taking action to change this bad news to good. Dina....my coffee saviour! Thanks for all the yummy goodies (still waiting for the BILL!!) & helping me organize. I feel so much better. Thanks to Jim for watching Anna today, too!!
Shaana~For your awesome chicken dish---it was GREAT!!! Anna hasn't seen her purse yet, but she's gonna love it! Thanks for the Cheer Bear/CD...so cute. And for assisting in the organization/carting 'o stuff down to the car. And for the research....I'll look into it soon.
Colleen~For making Anna laugh & for humoring her just about every day when we get home from school. For befriending my Mom....she freaking LOVES you....I'm like, "Okay, MOM! Enough about Colleen already!! Geez, she's not THAT great!" and for the hilarious picture of Anna as Dorothy. And for giving Dorothy an impromptu tour of your house, allowing her to open every single door without asking first and acting like it was no big deal. She digs you in a BIG way. AND for the surprise kitchen!! Jill is going to pee in her pants...which is no big deal, really...she does it at least 8 times every day.
Steve~For the enlightening chat. We are on the same wavelength....shutup Karen.
Mom~For staying with us for 2 whole weeks, playing countless hours with Anna, driving her to/from school, cleaning our house, cooking, hanging out with me at the hospital, and just being there to talk....it was great sharing a Corona with you on your last night. You are such a great person, and I'm glad we're friends.
And to everyone I didn't mention, who called or visited (I don't think I left out any visitors) or made food or brought us a needed item....I am too tired to think anymore tonight, but know that I appreciate every single act of kindness bestowed upon us. We are eternally grateful.
Jill is a ball of energy & doing awesome. She's flying up & down the hallways on her little car...I think they took the NG Tube out tonight. And I guess I'll share...but I don't have much detail....they found out today that she has a chromosomal abnormality (11q23), so she will absolutely need a bone marrow or stem cell transplant. Let the driving (bone marrow driving, that is) BEGIN. My Pedro friends have come up with some pretty great ideas on how to get some media attention or at least raise some funds ....my Torrance friend (Ann) is already fast at work on getting a drive going through TUSD, and my MO family, I hear, is getting it going, too. We need lots of prayer, love, & support (as per usual)....if Anna is a match, that is the best chance Jill's got. They will be testing her this week, I think. Whew. This is way more than I thought I could ever handle. Ask me tomorrow (today) how I'm doing.....I need to get to BED!! It's almost sun up! Thanks for listening....
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Semi-Permanent New Phone #
Okay, so we're in the same "new" room (321) but are now by the window (yay! even the construction view makes me happy to not be right by the door with NO privacy). So the # is 562-933-8341. At least, that's what they tell me....if that doesn't work, call the cell. We don't have a roomate tonight (this will NOT last), so I'm fortunate that it's my night to sleep here. I slept from 10:30-3am...Jill woke up for the 2nd time just screaming uncontrollably...wouldn't let me touch her...kept calling for "Daddy".....sigh.....poor baby. She needs something to TWIRL!!! She keeps opening & closing her fist right above her head, searching for her CURLS. I know that's what is bothering her! She would always console herself that way on waking up too soon.....does anyone have any ideas for comfy knit caps with tassels or something attached to the top (something soft) for her to twirl? I need all of my artsy-craftsy sewing friends/family to brainstorm :) We need some toppings for this bald little head!! Where is Debbie????? Ally...can we track her down? Off to try & sleep a little more.....visitors are VERY welcome over the next few weeks (baring other "issues"...call first) as she is feeling, overall, very well. Okay, g'night.
Sneaking in a "FW"
My friends Sallie sent this to me after her visit today....couldn't be more poignant (for all of us):
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began , he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes." The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things--your family, your children, yo ur health, your friends and your favorite passions--and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else--the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. "Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first--the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand." One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began , he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes." The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things--your family, your children, yo ur health, your friends and your favorite passions--and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else--the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. "Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first--the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand." One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."
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