Beautiful Day

So Jillian is on top of the world. Her energy is through the roof. Her attitude couldn't be better. She is the brightest, shiniest, most sparkliest ray of light I've ever ever ever seen. Despite not being able to open her eyes this morning (she is extremely sensitive to light right now because the chemo they gave her this last time was 10 times the strength of any before....and it was poisonous enough to begin with), she plowed through her breakfast opening her mouth wide like a baby bird and turning her head to where she thought the fork with the scrambled eggs may be coming in for a landing. She would reach both hands out in front of her, cupped, and try to grab her glass, which wasn't on her tray, then frown at me (with eyes squeezed shut) and say, "Where my tup doh?" And I'd place it in her hands, and she'd gulp it down, slam it on the tray..."Thanks mom!" After an hour or so (and some eyedrops, and some tylenol), she pryed them open and proceeded to have a helluva day in the hallway....trying on dress after dress, making up very elaborate dances, storming up to random strangers, taking their hands and leading them on an adventure to the jungle, the ocean, the palace.....

A most touching thing happened tonight....a mom and dad were in the hallway right outside of our room. The mom was crying and the dad was trying to comfort her. Jill pranced out of her room (right next door) holding her Gabriella and Troy dollies. She looked up at this mom and said (I'm not kidding), "You look like you need something. Here", and she thrust Gabriella into mom's hand. The mom wiped her tears, smiled, and said thank you....Jill was already on her way down the hall. A few minutes later, the dad came up to me and asked if we would come into his son's room so he could meet Jilly. I happily escorted her in there.....he is 17, very frail, with an NG tube, eyes wide open, trying to talk, but can't....trying to smile, but having a really hard time....I said, "Jilly, say hi." She blew him a kiss, then tucked her chubby forearm under her chin and cocked her head to the side (this is how she does it...she blows one then catches one). He tried very hard to lift his arm, but couldn't...he managed to lift a few fingers and one corner of his mouth turned up. I left the room with Jill feeling like I was carrying a guardian angel. I really really believe that she brings light to this place. People (new people) are constantly sticking their heads out of their rooms wondering "who is making all that joyful noise?" They can't believe she is only 2. And that she's "sick". I can't either. I can't either.

Thank you Renee and Kate for coming to visit tonight....for the books (Renee....Jill loves them...she wanted to pretend she was all the animals too), the citrus!!!, and mostly, the Kung Pao Chicken :) No, mostly for the company. It meant a lot to me that you came. I know it's rare you get a night free.

Congratulations a million times over to my good friend, Shaana, who passed her Doctorate Program and just submitted her dissertation....revised and completed. We may now call her "Dr. Berman"!!! Yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! If she stays at Launch next year (and all goes as planned), she will be Anna's new preschool teacher.

If anyone knows anyone who could watch Anna in the afternoons (3 days a week 12-4, in the Torrance/Lomita area) starting in September....a college kid, a neighbor who stays home with her kids & could use extra cash, an established home daycare.....please let me know. My wheels are turnin' about what to do for next year......going back to work/etc/etc.......